This is the latest installment of our weekly series about some of the crazy real-life horror stories from the week prior. We often cover these types of stories as it is, but this is kind of a round-up. It’s not necessarily a comprehensive look at all of the world’s horror of the week, but a collection of mostly oddball stories from across the web. Enjoy.

Horned Murderer Will See You In Hell

A man with horn implants was found guilty of murder (it’s always the ones you least suspect). He told the jury that convicted him that he’ll see them all in hell. I guess time will tell.

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Uber Hammer Attack

When you turn to Uber for a ride, the last thing you probably expect is to get beaten in the head with a hammer. At least until now. This happened to someone, however, and the victim was reportedly found “slipping in and out of consciousness on the sidewalk, suffering from severe fractures and trauma to the head.” More on this here.

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The Hair

Reports recently came out about a nine-pound hairball removed from an 18-year-old girl’s stomach. Thankfully, there are pictures! Believe it or not, they’re disgusting.

https://twitter.com/Rob_Stott/status/516748138330087424

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The Three-Breasted Sex Slavemaster

I’m sure you remember the three-breasted woman. As we knew, that was a hoax, but the story keeps getting more interesting. This past week, a teen said that she had kept him in a cage as a sex slave, and carved her name into his chest. Not sure what the hoax-level is on this aspect,  but either way, it’s a hell of a story.

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Motherfucking Snake In A Motherfucking Rental Car

Travelers in Maine found a ball python in the trunk of their rental car while at a hotel. Unfortunately, Samuel L. Jackson was not present for comment. More here.

Spiders Are In Your Bananas

Let’s face it, if you eat bananas, you’re eventually going to find spiders in them. That seems to be the takeaway from the countless stories we’ve seen over the years. It happened again. A schoolgirl wanted to take a banana to school for a healthy snack, but once she went to eat it, she found a nest of spiders within. Gross.

Dracula’s Dungeon

So they found Dracula’s dungeon. More specifically, archaeologists found what they believe is Vlad the Impaler’s dungeon in a Turkish castle. More here.

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The Dexter Killer

As iHorror’s Anthony Pernicka told us about the other day, a teenager killed and stored a girl in similar fashion to what has been depicted on an episode of serial killer show Dexter. Read his article here.

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The Car Killers

A man in Indianapolis was hit by four different cars, including while trying to crawl to safety after being hit initially. That’s horrifying enough, but what’s truly disturbing about this is that not a single one of the four cars even stopped. The man died. Story here.

Georgia Chainsaw Carchase 

This isn’t quite as horrific as the title implies, but how could I not include it? Thieves being chased by police threw chainsaws at them while trying to get away.

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The Potato Woman

A woman put a potato in her vagina as a contraceptive. Why? Her mom suggested it. Anyway, for one reason or another it stayed in there, and eventually sprouted roots growing into her reproductive organs. Naturally, she went to the doctor for abdominal pains.

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The Foot Burrowers

A man was unaware a chigoe flea had burrowed into his foot skin until he was sitting on his bed, and felt one burst out. He then discovered hundreds of eggs. Story here.

The Fish With Human Teeth

And we’ll close with this terrifying fish with human-like teeth. Honestly, fish teeth are typically scarier than human teeth, but there’s something pretty creepy about a fish with choppers like a man. This isn’t the first time these things have been spotted, but I’m not sure that makes it any less unsettling.

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