I love the craziness that goes into the horror genre. Sometimes it’s subtle. Sometimes it’s seriously in your face. But possibly the most absurd thing about the horror genre is that it boasts some of the most insane movie titles ever. Check out these really crazy ones – some are quite popular, and some are known for name alone. Let’s take a look.

C.H.U.D. (1984)

A bizarre series of murders in New York City seems to point toward the existence of a race of mutant cannibals living under the streets.

While the name may not seem that insane based on the acronym alone, once you know what it stands for, you’ll understand. Take a deep breath. Ready? C.H.U.D. stands for: Cannibalistic Humanoid Underground Dwellers. Yes. That’s real.

S.I.C.K. Serial Insane Clown Killer (2003)

A couple of friends are chased by a killer clown in the woods during a week-end.

This acronym is entirely stupid and does not even attempt to make grammatical sense. C.H.U.D. also at least had the sense to leave the title as the acronym alone. This movie just combines it into one long and ridiculous title.

Sometimes Aunt Martha Does Dreadful Things (1971)

Stanley and Paul, a pair of friends on the run from the law, rent a house in the suburbs, where they decide the best way to lay low is for Paul to dress as a woman and pretend to be Stanley’s Aunt Martha. Not too long after the pair move into their new home, Paul suddenly murders a young woman Stanley brings home with him. Paul’s violent tendencies continue to spin out of control, and soon nobody who comes near is safe from him.

So, from the title of this film, I can already just assume that Aunt Martha is going to do Dreadful things – but if it’s only sometimes, does that mean it may or may not happen during the course of the film? I guess you’ll have to watch it to find out. I’m not going to watch this, by the way.

Gore-met Zombie Chef From Hell (1986)

A cannibal opens up a seafood restaurant, and kills and cooks people to serve to his customers.

No words. Insane. How is this real?

I Bought a Vampire Motorcycle (1990)

When a motorbike gang kills an occultist, the evil spirit he was summoning inhabits a damaged bike. The bike is then bought and restored, but reveals its true nature when it tries to exact vengance on the gang, and anyone else who gets in its way.

Uh…okay. What? Who thinks of these titles? I usually try to come up with something of my own to add while writing these lists. On this one, though, I’m at a loss.

Monsturd (2003)

A serial killer mutates with a chemical inside a sewer, to become a monster made of human waste just as the FBI and police are onto him.

I’d say holy shit, but there does not seem to be anything even remotely holy about this in the slightest. Not one bit.

Killer Condom (1996)

The plot takes place in New York, and in the present. In a Hotel called “Quicky” a professor blackmails a student of his into having sex with him. But when the professor puts on a condom, the carnivorous condom bites off his penis and disappears. Detective Mackaroni who gets the case thinks that the college girl just bit off her teacher’s penis! Mackaroni goes to the motel himself to check out the crime scene, in the lobby he finds a gigolo named Bill and he asks him to follow him to crime room, there the two men attempt to have sex when they are suddenly interrupted by the attack of a killer condom.

If a penis doesn’t get bitten off during a horror movie, is it really a horror movie?

The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies!!? (1964)

Jerry falls in love with a stripper he meets at a carnival. Little does he know that she is the sister of a gypsy fortune teller whose predictions he had scoffed at earlier. The gypsy turns him into a zombie and he goes on a killing spree.

The absurdity of this title is heightened tenfold by the exclamation points and question mark at the end. I’m not sure exactly what this means – is the title asking us something? Or is it just confused? Now I’m confused.

Sssssss (1973)

Blood Orgy of the She-Devils (1973)