Connect with us

News

List Of The Best Zombie Ass-Kickers

Published

on

When it comes to zombie films, it seems that most viewers are most concerned about the zombies (and rightly so). People worry about the make-up, if they’re fast or slow, if they offer/add anything new to the genre, etc.

But what about the zombie killers? These unsung heroes of zombie films are often overlooked. Now I’m not talking about the typical character in a zombie film that survives by killing some zombies here and there. Come on, we expect a little more here at Dread Central for Christ’s sake!! The characters I’m talking about like… no, love killing zombies and go out of their way to destroy a brain or two. Below is a list of my favorite zombie ass-kickers, in no particular order.

Lionel Cosgrove, Dead Alive (1992)

I mean, seriously; has there been any character in zombie film history who starts off so timid and peaceful and ends up being one badass zombie killer?? Ok, ok, maybe Ash (see below). Lionel, though, has certainly earned a solid spot on this list for not just “taking care of business,” but by doing so with style, creativity, and a certain innocent-like bloodlust. The lawnmower scene alone is a modern-day classic.

Zombies-Dead-Alive-1024x576

Brooke, Wyrmwood (2014)

Wyrmwood has taken the zombie genre by storm, and rightly so. This is a fast-paced zombie flick. It’s like The Road Warrior and Undead had a love baby and named it Wyrmwood!! Without giving anything away, Brooke is the subject of some nasty zombie-based experiments, and after she escapes from her captors, she realizes she’s not quite the person she was before. She’s officially a badass zombie ass-kicker.

Zombies-Wyrmwood-1024x576

Alice, Resident Evil films (2002, ’04, ’07, ’10)

Granted, the films aren’t too good. I enjoyed the first RE, but honestly, this franchise got old really fast. Putting aside the films themselves, ya gotta admit that Alice (Milla Jovovich) is a badass zombie killer, and she looks fantastic doing it. We get side-boob and lots of upper thigh shots to make her zombie-killing scenes that much more entertaining. Alice isn’t just hot, she’s one tough broad that sincerely enjoys killing zombies with guns, knives, and her own bare hands.

Zombies-RE

 

Ashley J. Williams (aka Ash), Evil Dead films (1987)

Oh, Ash, what can I possibly say about one of the original badass zombie ass-kickers? There are three Evil Dead films, but I think Bruce Campbell’s best “Ash” performance is in the second one. Ash gets tormented as much as he kicks ass in part two (the laughing house, cutting off his own hand, etc.), but he never loses sight of the job at hand: killing zombies. And yes, I’m aware that the “dead” in the Evil Dead films are actually not zombies but demons possessing human bodies, but there was no way in hell I was leaving Ash off this list. Ash kicks ass, and that’s that.

Zombies-Evil-Dead

Ouessem, The Horde (2009)

First off, if you haven’t yet seen The Horde, what the fuck are you waiting for?? This is a fantastic zombie flick that may not redefine the zombie genre, but it will entertain the shit out of you. Everyone in the film kicks ass, but none more so than Ouessem (Jean-Pierre Martins). This crazy bastard relishes in killing zombies, and when he and the group get trapped in a parking garage, he sacrifices himself. But he doesn’t just curl up into the fetal position and eat a bullet. Hell no. He goes out in one of the best blazes of glory ever put on film. When he stands up on the hood of the car, you’ll be standing and cheering him on.

Zombies-The-Horde1

 

 

 

Marion, Undead (2003)

This movie really surprised me. When it starts, you immediately think you’re in for a long, shitty movie. The film doesn’t look all that good, the camera work is pretty basic, and even the soundtrack isn’t very impressive. But then the film hits its stride and you start having a lot of fun. When Marion (Mungo McKay), who is presented as the “town looney,” shows up, this film gets really fun and bloody really fast. Marion has an arsenal of homemade weapons, and he truly loves unleashing them on the legions of the undead. His trademark gun is a triple shotgun he welded together. It’ll totally remind you of the shotgun Reggie makes in Phantasm 2. Good times.

Zombies-Undead

 

Tom Hunt, Zombies of Mass Destruction (2009)

This film could have so easily fallen into melodrama and being too preachy, but writer-director Kevin Hamedani and writer Ramon Isao never forget they’re primarily making a zombie film. Tom Hunt (Doug Fahl) has come home with his boyfriend to the small community of Port Gamble to come out of the closet to his mom. What he didn’t expect was his mom being bit by a zombie and slowly turning into the undead during the dinner (in a scene that is an obvious homage to the luncheon scene in Dead Alive). Tom may start off as a very reluctant zombie killer, but by the end he is kicking ass and not caring about names. It seems he came out of the closet twice: once as a gay man and another as an ass-kicking zombie killer!!

Zombies-ZMD-1024x576

Peter, Dawn of the Dead (1978)

Did you really think I was gonna leave Peter off this list? Sure, in the beginning of the film Peter’s zombie killing was more utilitarian. He killed zombies to clear out the mall so they could live safely. But by the end he fully embraced his special skill at zombie killing. Near the end when he almost puts a bullet in his head and decides instead to fight, well, he uses nothing but his will to live and his fists of steel to fight his way through the hordes of the undead and make it up to the roof. Peter might just be the original Zombie Ass-Kicker!!

Zombies-Dawn

 

Tallahassee, Zombieland (2009)

Speaking of “special skills,” is there anyone who has more natural talent at killing zombies than Tallahassee (Woody Harrelson)? “My momma always said I’d be great at something. Who knew it’d be at killing zombies?” Fueled by a quest to find some goddamn Twinkies, Tallahassee treats each zombie he meets like the ones who killed his son. His eyes sparkle and his grin is wide as he kills off the undead. The final scenes in the amusement park solidify Tallahassee on this list.

Zombies-zombieland

Ash, Last of the Living (2008)

Another Ash? Hell ya!! Last of the Living is an indie zombie flick that isn’t without its problems, but it’s also a hell of a lot of fun. We follow around three slackers during the zombie apocalypse as they loot not just for food but also for some kick-ass video games, DVDs, and music. Their weapons of choice are simple weapons: a golf club, a baseball bat, and Ash (Ashleigh Southam) carries around two sticks. Ya see, Ash kinda fancies himself a martial arts expert and even has a special move he calls “The Berserker.” This is when he extends his arms out and twirls around really fast, like a helicopter. Out of the three friends, Ash seems to be the only one who really enjoys killing zombies. Just wait until you see him use “The Berserker” move on a group of zombies!! Ash also has a great scene on top of a car.

Zombies-Last-of-Living

 

Barbara, Night of the Living Dead (1990)

Hopefully I don’t need to stress I’m referring to the Barbara from Savini’s 1990 remake of this classic film. Let’s face it, Barbra from the original was about as effective as a twelve-step program for Amy Winehouse. Barbara (Patricia Tallman) from the remake, though, is most definitely not the same comatose Barbra from the original. She has her moments of being in shock, but she quickly comes out of her “coma” to truly kick some serious zombie ass. She makes Tony Todd look like a slacker. She never hesitates and is easily the best re-envisioned character in any remake I’ve seen. By the end of the film she looks like a battle-hardened ass-kicker, and I’d love to see a sequel to this one where we follow the “new Barbara” around.

Zombies-Barbara-1024x576

There’s my list. Who are your favorite zombie ass-kickers? Let me know who else I should’ve included on the list.

Listen to the 'Eye On Horror Podcast'

Listen to the 'Eye On Horror Podcast'

Click to comment

You must be logged in to post a comment Login

Leave a Reply

Lists

Yay or Nay: What’s Good and Bad in Horror This Week: 5/13 to 5/17

Published

on

Yay

Fall is getting not one but two sequels. It’s great news because now we know bad CGI can be consciously ignored when everything else is so great. 

Yay

A man is labeled a time traveler after allegedly entering a garden shed in his 30s and exiting the next day in his 60s. If the magic is true we can finally go back and talk to Jason Blum right after Paranormal Activity and make him promise to never to touch an Exorcist movie. 

Nay

The Coffee Table. This may be the first time we have suggested spoiling a film before actually seeing it. Wait. Maybe we spoiled Old by suggesting you don’t go see it. 

Nay

Prolific B moviemaker Roger Corman passes away at 98. He gave many actors and directors a chance in Hollywood, some would go on to win major awards. His films were outrageous, often gratuitous but always filled with heart. 

Yay

Clown Motel becomes a trilogy. Cheap Indy horror filmmakers aren’t micromanaged by rich and power studio execs so they can have fun with their material, and what better place to exercise that freedom than at a creepy desert motel in Nevada lorded over by hundreds of clowns. 

Nay

A Jason Universe is announced which promises many lateral “activations” in the Friday the 13th universe. Although the definition of said “activations” is never fully explained it leads us to believe it was a typo for “transactions” so Fortnite players scan by a Jason skin wearing a non-IP regulation hockey mask. 

Listen to the 'Eye On Horror Podcast'

Listen to the 'Eye On Horror Podcast'

Continue Reading

News

[Exclusive Photos & Trailer] Magnificent Films’ Vampire Feature ‘Drained’

Published

on

There have been some Vampires in the news this week; I’m not complaining! Sean Cronin and Peter Stylianou’s film Drained is screening at the Cannes Film Festival in France. Drained sounds like it has romantic and supernatural elements, conflict, emotional and psychological depth, and a rich setting. Go ahead and check out the press release below and our exclusive photos & teaser trailer. If you’re into vampires sprinkled with intriguing characters and a blend of genres, this may be your cup of blood!

Madalina Bellariu lon in ‘Drained’ [iHorror Exclusive]

British filmmakers’ Sean Cronin and Peter Stylianou’s London-based feature vampire film “Drained” has completed post-production and is headed to market at the prestigious Cannes Film Festival (May 14-25, 2024) in Cannes, France. 

The supernatural horror film – which was co-directed and produced by Cronin and Peter Stylianou from a screenplay by the latter — was filmed in London, England, and is a Magnificent Films/House 54/Red Guerilla Films co-production. Additional producers include Daniel Patrick Vaughan and Tony Currier. Cronin, as an actor, has portrayed villains in dozens of box office hits, as well as having directed several award-winning titles, including the upcoming feature ‘Bogieville.’ Peter Stylianou is a writer/director with two feature film credits already to his name. 

Reads the synopsis for ‘Drained,’ “In the neon-soaked streets of London, Thomas, a jobless post-graduate concept artist, falls in love with Rhea, a mysterious woman who turns out to be a vampire. As their twisted romance unfolds, Thomas’s health deteriorates, and he spirals out of control. 

BTS of Directors Peter Stylianou and Sean Cronin

Ruaridh Aldington (“Dirty Boy”) and Madalina Bellariu Ion (“Dampyr”) star as the ill-fated couple, with supporting cast which includes Craig Conway (“Dog Soldiers”), Angela Dixon (“Never Let Go”), Andrew Lyle-Pinnock, Natasha Patel (The Witcher: Blood Origin), Andrew Lee Potts (Band of Brothers), Diana Yekinni, Ayvianna Snow, Kenton Lloyd Morgan and Timothy Blore. 

Special makeup effects are by Francesca Reidie, with Ellie Campbell handling production design and cinematography by Daniel Patrick Vaughan.

Said Cronin of “Drained”, “Stylistically, the film is a mesmerizing blend of darkness and beauty. With a neon-noir aesthetic reminiscent of a night bus ride through London’s rain-soaked streets, we worked hard to capture the city’s underbelly, with a score and soundtrack that echoes the allure of ‘Drive’ with its synth 80s sound, striking the perfect balance between atmospheric and engaging.”

Ruaridh Aldington & Madaline Bellariu lon in ‘Drained’ [iHorror Exclusive]

Added Stylianou. “Beneath the surface of this vampiric romance, the film delves deeper, exploring the addictive nature of today’s society. Just as Thomas becomes ensnared in Rhea’s world, modern life presents its own metaphorical vampires, be it social media, substance abuse, or other self-destructive habits. The film paints a striking portrait of why individuals give themselves to these draining forces.

Added Madalina Bellariu Ion: “Growing up in Transylvania, Romania, I’ve always dreamt of playing a vampire. So, portraying Rhea was a perfect fit for me! The blend of fantasy horror and gritty realism in this film created an unforgettable experience that stayed with me long after filming ended. I hope the audience feels the same way after watching it. It’s a truly unique vampire film.”

[Exclusive] ‘Drained’ Teaser Trailer
‘Drained’ – Poster

About Magnificent Film & Television LTD

Magnificent Films was founded in 2007 by Sean Cronin to create imaginative, cinematic storytelling second to none. With a team of talented editors, writers, and production staff he has forged forward in building a dynamic film company for the 21st century. With working relationships with some of the best and established people in the industry yet keen to support and promote new talent both in front and behind the camera and from all areas of the community, Magnificent believes passionately that the industry should be accessible to all who have an aptitude and talent for storytelling in the medium of film and television.

Listen to the 'Eye On Horror Podcast'

Listen to the 'Eye On Horror Podcast'

Continue Reading

Movies

New Body Horror Film ‘The Substance’ Releases Teaser

Published

on

We haven’t seen Demi Moore in a movie since The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent back in 2022. She has been busy though, she had a part in Ryan Murphy’s latest Feud chapter and now she is contemplating altering her body to make it more youthful in the body horror film The Substance.

Apparently, according to the official synopsis, there is a newly developed beauty regimen that “generates another you. A new, younger, more beautiful, more perfect you. And there’s only one rule: You share time. One week for you. One week for the new you. Seven days each. A perfect balance. Easy. Right? If you respect the balance… what could possibly go wrong?”

A still from the film (used in out header) suggests that this new technology requires a lot more than dabbing it under your eyes or administering a sticky mask. The film premiered at the 2024 Cannes Film Festival and was bought by Mubi. No US release date has been announced.

The Substance

The Substance reminds us of another FDA nightmare, The Stuff (1985) in which a commercially marketed whipped treat turns people into zombies. That film is a dark comedy about consumerism and gluttony. While Deadline reports that The Substance is humourous as well as gory, they don’t say how rooted it is in satire.

Listen to the 'Eye On Horror Podcast'

Listen to the 'Eye On Horror Podcast'

Continue Reading