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[Fantastic Fest] ‘The Toxic Avenger’ is an Incredible Punk Rock, Drag Out, Gross Out Blast

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Toxic

When you first hear that a major studio like Legendary is taking on Troma’s The Toxic Avenger alarm bells begin to ring for a multitude of reasons. When you hear that Macon Blair is directing it, with Peter Dinklage, Elijah Wood and Kevin Bacon in tow, said alarm bells become def con 1 levels of excitement – and for good reason, y’all.

The Toxic Avenger takes Dinklage and places him in the ordinary guy role as Winston Gooze. This time instead of making him into a dweeb trying to get a date with a pretty girl, he is placed into the role of an awkward dad trying to impress his kiddo.

After a series of events and taking a plunge into a toxic bath, Winston is transformed into The Toxic Avenger. The film immediately pushes to 6th gear as Winston begins to take out some bad guys… and even some not-so-bad guys that end up murdered by circumstance and a toxic mop.

Elijah Wood in ‘The Toxic Avenger’

Dinklage might not be who you would expect to step into the role of The Toxic Avenger, but it doesn’t take long to see that he is perfect for the role. His awkward dad works perfectly to make him a lovable schlub. Of course, he really shines with toxic waste sheen when he is transformed. Dinklage gives a total performance even when covered in full body makeup and knocking heads off with a mop.

So far, the photos released have kept the makeup effects hidden in shadow. But, y’all. I’m here to say that you will not be disappointed. The makeup is brilliant and improves on the classic Toxie monster design while adding cool new features like an giant 8-ball hemorrhage eyeball. The makeup team had their hands full on this one. Not only does Dinklage suit up, but there are surprises along the way that call in the effects team to push to level 11 with heads popping, parkour experts exploding, and even a baby-headed monster. Sound too rad to be true? I assure you it’s true and rad.

Kevin Bacon in ‘The Toxic Avenger’

There is an entire cast of henchmen, new casters, and victims that make for a sheet full of names that fans will recognize. But, Toxie’s sidekick, Taylour Paige as J.J. Doherty has my vote for MVP here. Paige was also my MVP in Zola, a hell of a film in its own right. But, here we see Paige have a blast on screen while kicking ass and hitting Kevin Bacon in the dick with a toilet. Outside of her big action self, she has awesome comic timing and completes the Toxie experience.

In keeping with faces that you wouldn’t expect to see in a Toxic Avenger film, Kevin Bacon takes on the role of the villain. And it’s great to see him bring himself to the role and to watch him avoid big bad villain tropes. Bacon has fun with the role and has scenes filled with wall-to-wall laughs. It’s always great to see Bacon but watching him in this big cartoon villain of a role is huge fun.

Taylour Paige in ‘The Toxic Avenger’

Macon Blair has been an awesome presence in any film that he has acted in. He is one of those actors that shows up and makes whatever you are watching better. This is Blair’s big screen directorial debut and he doesn’t disappoint. Blair is a huge Troma fan and that shows in each and every second of the film’s many easter eggs. Not only does Blair add in tons of those nuggets, he also captures the spirit of Troma films and unleashes them in a flood of bodily fluids, gore, big laughs and a language Troma fans will surely understand.

The Toxic Avenger is a blast and full of Troma attitude. Macon Blair directs the hell out of this thing and makes the entire tidal wave of body parts and fun into an orchestra of gnarly punk rock good times. It is a perfect cross-pollination of  Lloyd Kaufman’s original monster and Blair’s updated Dinklage monster. The film is fueled by glopola, guts and great times. I can’t wait to watch it a thousand more times.

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Movie Reviews

Panic Fest 2024 Review: ‘Haunted Ulster Live’

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Everything old is new again.

On Halloween 1998, the local news of Northern Ireland decide to do a special live report from an allegedly haunted house in Belfast. Hosted by local personality Gerry Burns (Mark Claney) and popular children’s presenter Michelle Kelly (Aimee Richardson) they intend to look at the supernatural forces disturbing the current family living there. With legends and folklore abound, is there an actual spirit curse in the building or something far more insidious at work?

Presented as a series of found footage from a long forgotten broadcast, Haunted Ulster Live follows similar formats and premises as Ghostwatch and The WNUF Halloween Special with a news crew investigating the supernatural for big ratings only to get in over their heads. And while the plot has certainly been done before, director Dominic O’Neill’s 90’s set tale of local access horror manages to stand out on its own ghastly feet. The dynamic between Gerry and Michelle is most prominent, with him being an experienced broadcaster who thinks this production is beneath him and Michelle being fresh blood who is considerably annoyed at being presented as costumed eye candy. This builds as the events within and around the domicile becomes too much to ignore as anything less than the real deal.

The cast of characters is rounded out by the McKillen family who have been dealing with the haunting for some time and how it’s had an effect on them. Experts are brought in to help explain the situation including the paranormal investigator Robert (Dave Fleming) and the psychic Sarah (Antoinette Morelli) who bring their own perspectives and angles to the haunting. A long and colorful history is established about the house, with Robert discussing how it used to be the site of an ancient ceremonial stone, the center of leylines, and how it was possibly possessed by the ghost of a former owner named Mr. Newell. And local legends abound about a nefarious spirit named Blackfoot Jack that would leave trails of dark footprints in his wake. It’s a fun twist having multiple potential explanations for the site’s strange occurrences instead of one end-all be-all source. Especially as the events unfold and the investigators try to discover the truth.

At its 79 minute timelength, and the encompassing broadcast, it’s a bit of a slow burn as the characters and lore is established. Between some news interruptions and behind the scenes footage, the action is mostly focused on Gerry and Michelle and the build up to their actual encounters with forces beyond their comprehension. I will give kudos that it went places I didn’t expect, leading to a surprisingly poignant and spiritually horrifying third act.

So, while Haunted Ulster Live isn’t exactly trendsetting, it definitely follows in the footsteps of similar found footage and broadcast horror films to walk its own path. Making for an entertaining and compact piece of mockumentary. If you’re a fan of the sub-genres, Haunted Ulster Live is well worth a watch.

3 eyes out of 5
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Panic Fest 2024 Review: ‘Never Hike Alone 2’

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There are fewer icons more recognizable than the slasher. Freddy Krueger. Michael Myers. Victor Crowley. Notorious killers who always seem to come back for more no matter how many times they are slain or their franchises seemingly put to a final chapter or nightmare. And so it seems that even some legal disputes cannot stop one of the most memorable movie murderers of all: Jason Voorhees!

Following the events of the first Never Hike Alone, outdoorsman and YouTuber Kyle McLeod (Drew Leighty) has been hospitalized after his encounter with the long thought dead Jason Voorhees, saved by perhaps the hockey masked killer’s greatest adversary Tommy Jarvis (Thom Mathews) who now currently works as an EMT around Crystal Lake. Still haunted by Jason, Tommy Jarvis struggles to find a sense of stability and this latest encounter is pushing him to end the reign of Voorhees once and for all…

Never Hike Alone made a splash online as a well shot and thoughtful fan film continuation of the classic slasher franchise that was built up with the snowbound follow up Never Hike In The Snow and now climaxing with this direct sequel. It’s not only an incredible Friday The 13th love letter, but a well thought out and entertaining epilogue of sorts to the infamous ‘Tommy Jarvis Trilogy’ from within the franchise that encapsulated Friday The 13th Part IV: The Final Chapter, Friday The 13th Part V: A New Beginning, and Friday The 13th Part VI: Jason Lives. Even getting some of the original cast back as their characters to continue the tale! Thom Mathews being the most prominent as Tommy Jarvis, but with other series casting like Vincent Guastaferro returning as now Sheriff Rick Cologne and still having a bone to pick with Jarvis and the mess around Jason Voorhees. Even featuring some Friday The 13th alumni like Part III‘s Larry Zerner as the mayor of Crystal Lake!

On top of that, the movie delivers on kills and action. Taking turns that some of the previous fils never got the chance to deliver on. Most prominently, Jason Voorhees going on a rampage through Crystal Lake proper when he slices his way through a hospital! Creating a nice throughline of the mythology of Friday The 13th, Tommy Jarvis and the cast’s trauma, and Jason doing what he does best in the most cinematically gory ways possible.

The Never Hike Alone films from Womp Stomp Films and Vincente DiSanti are a testament to the fanbase of Friday The 13th and the still enduring popularity of those films and of Jason Voorhees. And while officially, no new movie in the franchise is on the horizon for the foreseeable future, at the very least there is some comfort knowing fans are willing to go to these lengths to fill the void.

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Panic Fest 2024 Review: ‘The Ceremony Is About To Begin’

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People will look for answers and belonging in the darkest places and the darkest people. The Osiris Collective is a commune predicated upon ancient Egyptian theology and was run by the mysterious Father Osiris. The group boasted dozens of members, each forgoing their old lives for one held in the Egyptian themed land owned by Osiris in Northern California. But the good times take a turn for the worst when in 2018, an upstart member of the collective named Anubis (Chad Westbrook Hinds) reports Osiris disappearing while mountain climbing and declaring himself the new leader. A schism ensued with many members leaving the cult under Anubis’ unhinged leadership. A documentary is being made by a young man named Keith (John Laird) whose fixation with The Osiris Collective stems from his girlfriend Maddy leaving him for the group several years ago. When Keith gets invited to document the commune by Anubis himself, he decides to investigate, only to get wrapped up in horrors he couldn’t even imagine…

The Ceremony Is About To Begin is the latest genre twisting horror film from Red Snow‘s Sean Nichols Lynch. This time tackling cultist horror along with a mockumentary style and the Egyptian mythology theme for the cherry on top. I was a big fan of Red Snow‘s subversiveness of the vampire romance sub-genre and was excited to see what this take would bring. While the movie has some interesting ideas and a decent tension between the meek Keith and the erratic Anubis, it just doesn’t exactly thread everything together in a succinct fashion.

The story begins with a true crime documentary style interviewing former members of The Osiris Collective and sets-up what led the cult to where it is now. This aspect of the storyline, especially Keith’s own personal interest in the cult, made it an interesting plotline. But aside from some clips later on, it doesn’t play as much a factor. The focus is largely on the dynamic between Anubis and Keith, which is toxic to put it lightly. Interestingly, Chad Westbrook Hinds and John Lairds are both credited as writers on The Ceremony Is About To Begin and definitely feel like they’re putting their all into these characters. Anubis is the very definition of a cult leader. Charismatic, philosophical, whimsical, and threateningly dangerous at the drop of a hat.

Yet strangely, the commune is deserted of all cult members. Creating a ghost town that only amps up the danger as Keith documents Anubis’ alleged utopia. A lot of the back and forth between them drags at times as they struggle for control and Anubis keeps continuing to convince Keith to stick around despite the threatening situation. This does lead to a pretty fun and bloody finale that fully leans into mummy horror.

Overall, despite meandering and having a bit of a slow pace, The ceremony Is About To Begin is a fairly entertaining cult, found footage, and mummy horror hybrid. If you want mummies, it delivers on mummies!

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