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Classic Campbell: Best One-Liners from Army of Darkness

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tumblr_m90rhtr4KZ1r9prsfo6_250 The Evil Dead trilogy delivered memorable moment after memorable moment, but let’s face it, Army of Darkness is in a class by itself and as such, deserves, nay requires its own top ten list.

Now that I’ve gone all CNN and dropped that news on you, the real question becomes how in the hell do you limit The King to just ten one-liners from such a classic? Perhaps iHorror’s own Patti Pauley said it best — “It’s hard to put them in order, they’re all equally amazing.”

Why employ an exercise in futility? You know that Leland Gaut adage “Kill them all, let God sort them out?” It applies here.

So we embark on ten of Bruce Campbell’s best from Army.

Enjoy, screwheads.

BoomstickWell, hello Mr. Fancy Pants

When all hell breaks loose, rank no longer applies. Let the shit-talk commence.

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Nailed it

The gasped shriek Campbell emits when he steps on the nail should have garnered an Academy Award.

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What’s that on your face?

Not here or here so much…but right here.

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Blow

When you have a harem feeding you grapes, you’re less than forgiving.

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Good guy, bad guy

So you will listen to every damn word I have to say.

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Look backYo…

Let’s show this prehistoric bitch how we do things downtown.

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It’s an “N” word

Before anyone gets all worked up, this has nothing to do with the Confederate flag.

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Honey…

Hallmark’s on the phone. You say the sweetest things.

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Groovy

Ahhh, gotta love the nod back to Evil Dead 2.

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This is my BOOMstick!

No introduction necessary.

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‘Dahmer’ Has Broken Netflix Series Debut Records – Crushing Even ‘Squid Game’

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Dahmer

Squid Game was event television when it dropped onto Netflix. I don’t know if you remember but the number of folks chatting about the series was insanely high and something you couldn’t escape anywhere. Well, Ryan Murphy’s recent debut of Monster: The Jeffrey Dahmer Story somehow eclipsed that show’s number of viewers by a long shot in its first week.

The chilling exploration of serial killer, Jeffrey Dahmer pulled in 192.6 million viewers within its first week. During, Squid Game’s first week the series saw 63.1 million viewers tuning in. That is a huge debut for the series that is now Netflix’s number one series.

The synopsis for Netflix’s Dahmer goes like this:

Between 1978 and 1991, Jeffrey Dahmer gruesomely took the lives of seventeen innocent victims. DAHMER – Monster: The Jeffrey Dahmer Story is a series that exposes these unconscionable crimes, centered around the underserved victims and their communities impacted by the systemic racism and institutional failures of the police that allowed one of America’s most notorious serial killers to continue his murderous spree in plain sight for over a decade.

Have you watched Evan Peter’s chilling transformation into Dahmer yet?

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‘Slash/Back’ Trailer is Filled With Kids Fighting Lovecraftian Body Horrors

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Slash

‘Slash/Back’ is giving us a very The Thing-aligned sort of plot with one major exception… this film is about a group of young girls instead of a bunch of grumpy dudes. Slash/Back also features some very Lovecraftian bits compounded by the use of some intense-looking body horror. All-in-all, there is nothing to not absolutely dig about this trailer.

A small town becomes the target of a monster invasion and it’s up to a group of kiddos to go on the warpath against all of them.

The synopsis for Slash/Back is as follows:

Set in Pangnirtung, Nunavut, a sleepy hamlet nestled in the majestic mountains of Baffin Island in the Arctic Ocean, SLASH/BACK opens as the village wakes up to a typical summer day. No School, no cool boys (well… except one), and 24-hour sunlight.  But for Maika and her ragtag friends, the usual summer is suddenly not in the cards when they discover an alien invasion threatening their hometown. These teenagers have been underestimated their whole lives but, using makeshift weapons and their horror movie knowledge, they show the aliens you don’t f*** with the girls from Pang.

The film stars Tasiana Shirley, Alexis Vincent-Wolfe, Nalajoss Ellsworth and Chelsea Prusky.

Slash/Back is in theaters, On Demand and on digital beginning October 21.

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‘Holy Spider’ Trailer Explores True Events Surrounding Brutal Serial Killer

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Holy Spider

Director, Ali Abbasi has won best director at Fantastic Fest 2022 for Holy Spider. The director of Border goes in a totally different direction this time around by heading into the dark, and dreary streets of the Iranian Holy City of Masshad. The film explores serial killer Saeed Hanaei who prowled the nights streets of Masshad looking for prostitutes to murder.

The synopsis for Holy Spider goes like this:

Female journalist Rahimi (Zar Amir Ebrahimi) travels to the Iranian holy city of Mashhad to investigate a serial killer who believes he is doing the work of God, cleansing the streets of sinners by murdering sex workers. As the body count mounts and Rahimi draws closer to exposing his crimes, the opportunity for justice grows harder to attain as the ‘Spider Killer’ is embraced by many as a hero. Based on the horrific true story of serial killer Saeed Hanaei, acclaimed writer-director Ali Abbasi (Border) unveils a gripping crime thriller and a daring indictment of a society in which rough justice is routinely a fact of life.

We will be sure to keep you up to date on future updates including an official release date which shouldn’t be too far off.

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