Ahh… Here we go. I’ve done a few pieces on remakes in the horror genre and if there is one thing most of us fans can agree on, it’s that most remakes suck. Notice I used the word “most”. Of course, the reaction is always the same when we hear the word “remake” or “reboot”. Moans, groans, and wanting to blow up whoever is behind said rebooted movie with our anger and beating of the fists.

But, Sometimes, we just have to suck it up and give a remake a chance because they don’t always suck. Don’t get me wrong here. I’ve always said Hollywood uses remakes to make a quick buck on an existing successful movie. And most of the time that is quite the case. But, there are a few out there that are executed in sheer brilliance and dare I say even top the original. That being said, this list I’ve compiled is just from atop my noggin.

Here are 10 horror remakes that don’t suck:

10. My Bloody Valentine 3D (2009)

This, in some ways, improved version pushed the boundaries of nudity, sex, and bloody violence, all in the glorious third dimension.  If you don’t believe me, check out this video below. I gave it my seal of gore approval.

 

9. The Hills Have Eyes (2006)

This one of the remakes I felt was far more superior than the original. The R-rated and brutally violent Hills of 2006 generated a lot of buzz with horror fans and grossed over 40 million at the box office. A sequel came out shortly thereafter but didn’t quite par up to the original or the remake.

 

8. Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)

I was quite hesitant about this one. But I was pleasantly surprised with the outcome. Does it hold the same magic as the original? Not in my opinion. But it certainly does hold up well with keeping true to the storyline, great actors, and brilliant cinematic filming. And I didn’t have to hear Franklin’s ever so annoying bitching in this new generation take. Yeah… I was ok with that.

 

7. I Spit On Your Grave (2010)

Ahh, once again this remake is just as good as the original but with just an updated look and just as brutal if not more than the first. The story of a novelist who ventures out into the woods and goes from a victim to a vengeful hero works, in this case, thanks to great directing and a stellar performance by Sarah Butler.

 

6. Little Shop Of Horrors (1987)

Ok. Sure technically it’s not a horror film, but hey, I had to give it an honorable mention. I mean you’d have to be crazy not to love a singing plant that feeds on human flesh and blood, right? With the help of Jim Henson puppeteers, Audrey 2 was brought to life in this stunning horror- comedy- musical. The original came out in 1960 and although was superb for its time; This is one I can say on record far exceeds the original.

 

5. The Blob (1988)

The Blob is one that should definitely be in any horror fanatics collection. This is one remake that managed to live up to its cheesy inspiration that was Chuck Russell’s vision, in which the title goo crashes to earth and promptly begins digesting the residents of a small California town while growing to gargantuan proportions. Also worth mentioning is that yet another Blob remake is in the works. 

 

4. The Thing (1982)

The Thing is surely one of the greatest Sci-Fi-Horror flicks ever made. This version that stars Kurt Russell is absolutely brilliant and damn near flawless. I really don’t know what else to say other than if you haven’t seen it then you must sit down and watch it. Right meow. No really. Stop reading this and go let your eyes sink into a showcase of Kurt Russell’s majesty!

 

3. Frankensein (1931)

I know what some of you may be thinking. That is the original right? Wrong! The original was a short silent film made in 1910 made by Edison Studios. The 1931 version directed by legend James Whale broke boundaries and was a pioneer in film. In my opinion, it paved the way for many more horror movies to follow in its footsteps and most rightfully deserves a spot on this list.

 

2. The Fly (1986)

What can I say about David Cronenberg’s masterpiece The Fly? I mean other than it’s just that. Another remake that I can safely far outweigh the 1958 original in gore and storyline. Jeff Goldblum gives a fantastic performance as “Brundlefly” and shows us if Hollywood is going to remake a film, this is how it’s done.

 

1. Dawn Of the Dead (2004)

Another film I was wary about being as how I’m a huge Romero and zombie fan. When the movie came to the screen in 2004, I was completely blown away. So much so, that I almost went into labor with my first child from too much excitement and zombie nerdgasms. The amazing special effects paired with great-looking zombies and a brilliant cast made this film a hit. While it is much different than the original, it is well worth watching and two thumbs up from this broad.