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Speculation in the Wake of “Ashy Slashy”

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“Ash vs Evil Dead” producer Rob Tapert noted that the goal for “Ashy Slashy” was to morph Ash (Bruce Campbell) into something of an homage to eighties slashers once he embarked on his quest to destroy the Necronomicon and the Ghost Beaters.

And they nailed it. Unicorns and all.

The chainsaw blade pulled against an asylum wall held elements of Freddy Krueger and damned if Jefe didn’t look a bit bulkier as he Voorhees’d through the halls.

But an eye-gouging throwback aside, that’s not what you’re here for, and I know that.

So enough with the foreplay, let’s get down to business. If you have not seen “Ashy Slashy,” I implore you to click out of this post right now because there are monumental spoilers to follow.

As someone who is an avid “Game of Thrones” fan, I have never been more upset with the death of a character than I was when Pablo (Ray Santiago) was halved by a desperate Baal (Joel Tobeck) at the conclusion of “Ashy Slashy.” In fact, that’s exactly what I wanted to do — bawl.

However, I’m not going to focus on Pablo dying a hero because there are just too many factors that lead me to believe we haven’t seen the last of our powerful vagina.

To begin, the foreshadowing was overwhelming. There was nothing subtle about it. And that’s kind of the point of foreshadowing. Let’s face it, “Ash vs Evil Dead” has been hinting at Pablo’s departure since the season began, and that strikes me as not only a bit much, but also too obvious. I’m just going to go ahead and say it, when it comes to Evil Dead, the most beloved character not named Ash is Pablo. For a player of such magnitude to be taken from us, it would simply need to be more shocking and out of left field. Perhaps not a long and agonizing death like Amanda (Jill Marie Jones), but one that would pack a more powerful punch because we weren’t already suspicious that it was going to happen. With all the hinting and near-misses through the season’s first seven episodes, no one could claim that they didn’t see Pablo’s apparent ouster coming.

Splatstick or not, “Ash vs Evil Dead” is a a show that qualifies as well done, so that strikes me out of place.

Secondly, in the episode breakdown for “Ashy Slashy,” Tapert confirmed that Pablo died, but quickly offered that it wasn’t the first time that the franchise had killed off an important character. While that’s true (and the breakdowns are always brief), it was a quick-hitter that offered about as much emotion or nod to importance as when Lee Majors passed earlier in the season. To show Pablo as much love as someone who appeared in a handful of episodes seems fishy to me.

Next, in our Q&A with Dana DeLorenzo in August, she said a few things that are glaring in the wake of “Ashy Slashy.”

I mean, I’m sorry to keep going back to the same conversation, but Ms. Maxwell gave us a lot to digest, and it’s altogether fitting for this argument.

There will be a mistake — in general, I’m not going to say who made it — that cannot be undone. Actually, I shouldn’t say a mistake because it’s not really a mistake. There will be an “action” that cannot be undone.

DeLorenzo said that there would be “an ‘action’ that cannot be undone.” Now, a man being cut in half seems pretty final, but let’s not forget how she began her statement. You’ll note that originally, DeLorenzo said there would be “a mistake” before rephrasing to “an ‘action.’ Pablo’s death at the hand of Baal was certainly an action, but nothing about that struck me as a mistake because none of the Ghost Beaters were involved. That Pablo was the personification of the Necronomicon and would be the one to banish Baal had been the plan all along.

pabloThen there’s DeLorenzo’s response to my question about how the relationship between Pablo and Kelly would progress in Season 2:

When I watch the show I just want to scream at the TV like “Oh my God, just make out already!” You root for them and I think what’s so great about their relationship is the yin and yang aspect. Pablo makes Kelly softer, she makes him harder and I really love how they are just either side of the coin together. They’re just so great. Here’s what I will say about Season 2 with Kelly and Pablo, they definitely get closer but also they know that in their world if they make if official one of them is going to end up dead, it’s inevitable. So this season you will see them get even closer — hint, hint — but you’ll have to wait and see if they can beat the odds or if the house of evil always wins.

Focus on that final sentence.

“So this season you will see them get even closer — hint, hint — but you’ll have to wait to see if they can beat the odds or if the house of evil always wins.”

Let’s start with the “hint, hint.” Unless I missed something, there was no indication that the two had hooked up in any way, shape or form. There were some tender moments to be sure, but nary a kiss or a wink or hand-holding or even the accidental slippage of a “baby” from either one of them.

To my mind, Kelly and Pablo have not yet had their “hint, hint” moment.

Which brings us to the latter part of DeLorenzo’s sentence.

“…you’ll have to wait and see if they can beat the odds or if the house of evil always wins.”

We will need to wait and see. It would certainly appear so. Can the tandem beat the odds? As in finding a way to bring Pablo back with Ruby’s (Lucy Lawless) help or “will the house of evil always” win?

Santiago’s Twitter messages weren’t exactly definitive, either. For instance, in response to one fan’s sadness over Pablo’s passing, Santiago wrote, “Don’t be too sad! Hang in there! In the EVILDEAD world, everything happens 4 a reason!”

An earlier message stated “Playing #Pablo has been a dream come true! An illegal immigrant with a plan 2 stand by a hero n save the world from evil! #ashvsevildead”

Hang in there, everything happens for a reason and “has been” not was a dream come true. Perhaps I’m grasping at straws, but I just don’t we’ve seen the last of Pablito.

All that said, let’s consider a couple of things to bring it home.

The season’s final two episodes are titled “Home Again” and “Second Coming,” so let’s do a little speculating of our own.

Episode 9 will find Ash and the remaining Ghost Beaters returning to the cabin where weird shit happens all the time. However, the only important thing to remember here is that they will once again find themselves in Ash’s old stomping grounds.

Why? Let’s wind the clocks back and remember that for the inaugural season of “Ash vs Evil Dead,” the show wasn’t allowed to touch on any of the events from Army of Darkness. Those reasons were legal in nature, but that changed for Season 2, and the idea of Delta as DeLorean is fair game now.

If I had to guess (which is all I can do at this point), I’d be willing to wager that “Second Coming” has less to do with the group’s return to the cabin or Baal’s resurrection or even Yeats, than another trip through the portal to the land of Sheila and Mr. Fancypants. Said trip will lead to some adjustments that will find Pablo alive and well for Season 3 and not simply appearing as Ash’s Obi-Wan wing-man.

I’m sorry, but Pablo was (and remains) too adored to have left the show in such an unceremonious manner. Then again, maybe I’m wrong and none of us will ever have the pleasure of Honduran fish and chips.

If that’s the case, Pablito died a hero and certainly made Brujo proud, but something tells me nothing is settled.

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‘The Strangers’ Invaded Coachella in Instagramable PR Stunt

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Renny Harlin’s reboot of The Strangers isn’t coming out until May 17, but those murderous home invaders are making a pit stop at Coachella first.

In the latest Instagramable PR stunt, the studio behind the film decided to have the trio of masked intruders crash Coachella, a music festival that takes place for two weekends in Southern California.

The Strangers

This type of publicity began when Paramount did the same thing with their horror movie Smile in 2022. Their version had seemingly ordinary people in populated places look directly into a camera with an evil grin.

The Strangers

Harlin’s reboot is actually a trilogy with a more expansive world than that of the original.

“When setting out to remake The Strangers, we felt there was a bigger story to be told, which could be as powerful, chilling, and terrifying as the original and could really expand that world,” said producer Courtney Solomon. “Shooting this story as a trilogy allows us to create a hyperreal and terrifying character study. We’re fortunate to be joining forces with Madelaine Petsch, an amazing talent whose character is the driving force of this story.”

The Strangers

The movie follows a young couple (Madelaine Petsch and Froy Gutierrez) who “after their car breaks down in an eerie small town, are forced to spend the night in a remote cabin. Panic ensues as they are terrorized by three masked strangers who strike with no mercy and seemingly no motive in The Strangers: Chapter 1 the chilling first entry of this upcoming horror feature film series.”

The Strangers

The Strangers: Chapter 1 opens in theaters on May 17.

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‘Alien’ Returning to Theaters For a Limited Time

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It’s been 45 years since Ridley Scott’s Alien hit theaters and in celebration of that milestone, it is headed back to the big screen for a limited time. And what better day to do that than Alien Day on April 26?

It also works as a primer for the upcoming Fede Alvarez sequel Alien: Romulus opening on August 16. A special feature in which both Alvarez and Scott discuss the original sci-fi classic will be shown as a part of your theater admission. Take a look at the preview of that conversation below.

Fede Alvarez and Ridley Scott

Back in 1979, the original trailer for Alien was kind of terrifying. Imagine sitting in front of a CRT TV (Cathode Ray Tube) at night and suddenly Jerry Goldsmith’s haunting score begins to play as a giant chicken egg starts to crack with beams of light bursting through the shell and the word “Alien” slowly forms in slanted all caps across the screen. To a twelve-year-old, it was a scary pre-bedtime experience, especially Goldsmith’s screaming electronic musical flourishes playing over scenes of the actual movie. Let the “Is it horror or sci-fi?” debate begin.

Alien became a pop culture phenomenon, complete with kid’s toys, a graphic novel, and an Academy Award for Best Visual Effects. It also inspired dioramas in wax museums and even a frightening setpiece at Walt Disney World in the now-defunct Great Movie Ride attraction.

Great Movie Ride

The film stars Sigourney Weaver, Tom Skerritt, and John Hurt. It tells the tale of a futuristic crew of blue-collar workers suddenly awakened out of stasis to investigate an undecipherable distress signal coming from a nearby moon. They investigate the source of the signal and discover it’s a warning and not a cry for help. Unbeknownst to the crew, they have brought a giant space creature back on board which they find out in one of the most iconic scenes in cinema history.

It is said that Alvarez’s sequel will pay homage to the original film’s storytelling and set design.

Alien Romulus
Alien (1979)

The Alien theatrical re-release will take place on April 26. Pre-order your tickets and find out where Alien will screen at a theater near you.

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Home Depot’s 12-Foot Skeleton Returns with a New Friend, Plus New Life-Size Prop from Spirit Halloween

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Halloween is the greatest holiday of them all. However, every great holiday needs amazing props to go with it. Luckily for you, there are two new amazing props that have been released, which are sure to impress your neighbors and frighten any neighborhood children who are unfortunate enough to wander past your yard.

The first entry is the return of the Home Depot 12-foot skeleton prop. Home Depot has outdone themselves in the past. But this year the company is bringing bigger and better things to their Halloween prop lineup.

Home Depot Skeleton Prop

This year, the company unveiled its new and improved Skelly. But what is a giant skeleton without a loyal friend? Home Depot has also announced that they will release a five-foot tall skeleton dog prop to eternally keep Skelly company as he haunts your yard this spooky season.

This bony pooch will be five feet tall and seven feet long. The prop will also feature a posable mouth and LCD eyes with eight variable settings. Lance Allen, Home Depot’s merchant of decorative Holliday gear, had the following to say about this year’s lineup.

“This year we increased our realism within the animatronics category, created some impressive, licensed characters and even brought back some fan favorites. Overall, we are most proud of the quality and value we are able to bring to our customers with these pieces so they can continue to grow their collections.”

Home Depot Prop

But what if giant skeletons just aren’t your thing? Well, Spirit Halloween has you covered with their giant life size Terror Dog replica. This massive prop has been ripped out of your nightmares to appear frighteningly on your lawn.

This prop weighs in at almost fifty pounds and features glowing red eyes that are sure to keep your yard safe from any toilet paper throwing hooligans. This iconic Ghostbusters nightmare is a must have for any fan of 80s horror. Or, anyone who loves all things spooky.

Terror Dog Prop
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